Hi everyone,
I’m new here and would appreciate some advice. I went on holiday a year ago to an Asian country where I discovered I was hep b positive while getting blood tests for a surgery. I suspect I contracted the virus from getting my beard shaved at salons (via razors) or at a dentist’s office.
I didn’t realize how severe the situation was until I met someone recently. Everything was going well until the conversation came up and she couldn’t handle it (understandably) and decided she just wanted to be friends. I just feel so contaminated, sick, dirty, etc. I don’t want to be in the same position again where I have to convince someone to take a vaccine to date me.
I think what’s hurting the most mentally is that I was already managing life with a disability (low vision) and now this virus is driving me insane. I don’t understand why I have to experience such traumatic events in life. Sorry for whining. I’m just really scared about my future. I don’t want to have to deal with medication or liver cancer and/or give the impression that a potential partner would have to take care of me. FYI, my viral load was 5400 as of july last year and I’m Hbeag negative.
I’m hoping that bepirovirsen becomes available here in Australia by the end of the year so that I can take it and get cured of this plague.
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I also don’t know where or how I got infected either, or if I was born with this little monster. I only believed it when I had the second test.
I had symptoms when I was 30 years old and I’ll be 52 soon, and I’m still in good health.
We have hepatitis B, okay, but that doesn’t mean we stop being human or that we can’t live normally. Can it kill us? Yes, but we could die in a plane or car accident. So we don’t need to keep thinking about it, we just need to take care of ourselves.
And today there are effective antivirals to control this little monster.
Translated with DeepL.com (free version)
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Hi @Not_Admin,
Welcome to the community. I appreciate your courage to share your experience. Sharing our experiences can be empowering and healing. I hear you, and I agree that no one should go through this. While we cannot control how people react to our diagnosis/status, we must be aware and acknowledge that rejection, isolation, stigma, depression, etc., do happen. It is horrible to be or feel rejected because of an illness we did not ask for, but I think it’s helpful for us to be prepared for the unexpected reaction (s). They are not right, however, these things do happen. I don’t think you are dirty or contaminated at all, but I understand how these experiences make one feel that way.
I don’t think you are whining at all. You are being honest and open about what you are feeling and experiencing. We have all been through it and continue to experience it. Be kind to yourself and know that it is not your fault to be in this situation. Take deep breaths in and out, and try calming yourself down. All is not lost; there is still hope for us all. Remain in care and take things slow: one day at a time.
I hope this community is helpful, especially knowing that you are not alone in this fight. Best, and keep us posted on how things are going.
Bansah1
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