I’m sorry you feel this way and the immense strain that you must be under. We in the community are here to help each other and hope you feel that others are going through the same thing as you.
As mentioned in the other threads, it can be dangerous to stop your medication without discussing with your doctor and there are ways to manage the effects of these medications.
But, in the immediate term, you are understandably upset with your situation. This forum up for people to connect with one another and always having people around to listen with an understanding ear. But if you don’t find this is help you enough, I would really encourage you to reach out to someone local to help you change your situation so that you feel better and more hopeful about the future.